Okay people, today we’re going to discuss a touchy subject – bridesmaidzillas. Yes, this is a real thing – we’ve seen it countless times (not just in the movies) and it never ceases to amaze us (in the worst way possible). We love bridal parties – we love seeing the bride and groom hanging with their nearest and dearest on the most important day of their lives and revelling in the fun with their besties. We equal parts do not love bridesmaidzillas. Luckily, we’re here to help you not to become the dreaded bridesmaidzilla by giving you tips on how to be a great bridesmaid!

Don’t be like Annie or Helen! – Bridesmaids

The Definition of A Bridesmaid:

noun.

a girl or woman who accompanies a bride on her wedding day.

The Whim Definition of A Bridesmaidzilla:

noun.

a girl or woman who accompanies a bride on her wedding day but makes the entire process of getting there HELL.

As you can see, there is a stark difference in the two definitions, yet somehow a few bridesmaidzillas seem to slip through the cracks every year.

Luckily, we’ve compiled a few helpful tips on how not to become a bridesmaidzilla!

Understand the True Responsibilities of Being a Bridesmaid

I know, I know, Instagram keeps telling us that bridesmaids show up, look beautiful, sip yummy cocktails and dance the night away – but the role is a bit more involved than that! Every wedding is different, but bridesmaids are typically close friends or family of the bride and groom. These trusted folks are asked to be a part of the bridal party because the bride and groom need their closest compadres to help get them from engaged to I Do!

Be like these beauties – happy and carefree – photo via ChriLee Photography

Typically the bridal party is responsible for pre-wedding events like showers and bachelorettes, as well as assisting with DIY decor projects, picking colour schemes and attire. It’s also an unwritten rule that bridal party members are sympathetic shoulders to lean on when the process of planning a wedding gets to be a little overwhelming.

Be Real About Issues You’ve Got Going On

Be real with your friend about any issues you have going on- financial or otherwise. We all know that there are hard costs associated with being a bridesmaid – like purchasing a dress, paying for hair and makeup or mani/pedis, and throwing pre-wedding events. If budgets are tight, be upfront with the bride. The same goes for any family/relationship/work issues that you have going on that could impede your ability to perform your bridal party duties. If you’ve been friends all this time, there’s no reason to think she’ll turn into a fire-breathing dragon when you broach your ability to be the best bridesmaid ever. Chances are your dear friend will still be your dear friend. However, if you decide to ghost on your bridesmaid responsibilities without rhyme or reason, your friend probably won’t be as forgiving.

Plan Kick-Ass Pre-Wedding Events

This doesn’t necessarily mean to break the bank and destroy yourself financially. Catering coming up too pricey? Do a breakfast or a brunch and have everyone pitch in. Work as a team to set a reasonable budget and be prepared to get creative to pull off a wonderful and authentic bridal shower, bachelorette and/or brunch for your bestie. Don’t phone it in for this – this is literally one of your major responsibilities. Nothing is worse than putting a half-assed, mediocre and not well thought out shower or bach for your bride. It’s the only one she’s going to get, so do your best to make it great!

A lovely engagement party, bridal shower or bachelorette party should be well thought out, not necessarily overly expensive, but personalized to the bride

Wear the Dress – Seriously

Be present and a part of the process of choosing the bridal party attire, but be prepared to wear a dress that you may not love and may not be to your exact tastes. These days most of our brides are pretty conscientious about choosing flattering frocks, but every so often a bride will have her heart set on a particular style, fabric or colour. If this is the case, just remember that it is for one day, and you’re doing it for someone you love. Grin and bear it, wear the dress and smile ’til it hurts. It is never appropriate to swap out the dress or throw a tantrum over a piece of clothing. At the end of the day, this day is about your friends tying the knot – not about your outfit.

Via Gorgeous in Grey

Fun story – I (Alisha) once had to wear a dress that was a monstrosity. I won’t give too many details to protect the guilty parties but it was ill-fitting, the colours clashed and it was just awful. Still, I smiled through it and had a great day for the sake of the bride and groom. If I could live through (and pay for) that obscenity of a dress (seriously, it was bad), you can too!

Okay, you’re ready to go out there and be the best bridesmaid ever, and not a bridesmaidzilla! We’re confident that if you follow our handy tips, you’ll rock this bridal party thang! Good luck!

Whim Event Planning and Design is a team of Toronto wedding planners specializing in modern romantic weddings for fun, sweet couples. Get in touch with us today to start planning your dream day!